Interpersonal Communication

During my life span, I have learned as well as I am learning that in any relationship, whether social or in our business acquaintances, we try to persuade others by the use of rhetoric, the emotive power of language, euphemisms, rhetorical analogies, stereotyping, innuendo’s loaded questions, ridicule and sarcasm to win others to see our point of view. These are but a few of the tools that we use and I find that I am no stranger to most of them.

I find that I must review from time to time my objectivity when it comes to the subject of psychological and related fallacies. Fallacy- according to Moore & Parker, (2007) Critical Thinking, 8th ed. , cites that a fallacy is a mistake in reasoning. We can use for instance one that I am very familiar with being confronted with in the past and present. Since people generally accept fallacies as legitimate arguments, let us not include legitimate arguments as fallacies, I think about the argument from outrage.

Say a person gets angry enough about something, and if one is in the theory of righteous indignation, it becomes much too easy; throw reason out the window and accept whatever alternative is being offered by the speaker just from indignation alone. Interpersonal communication (one on one) communicating allows me to observe and develop empathy and communicate effectively. In the Hair Salon business the personalities of my clientele varies on a daily basis.

I have found that it is very important to remember that emotions and intellect both play major roles in managing strategic flexibility in my line of business. Some more recent experiences really tested my self-control, emotional intelligence, and listening skills. One tool I find is very useful is listening to the person speaking without commenting, and when I do comment I add a cordial explanation. This has a soothing affect most of the time. There are times that I try to share some personal thoughts with my clients, to make sure they understand me from a business point of view and a human point of view.

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Openness with any relationship you may hold some things to personal to share, but the one thing I share willingly is my spiritual life or how I manage with my ever-changing roles as a cosmetologist, student, and all other variables that are forever changing in my day-to-day experiences. I have to say to this, at times, I must be subjective, sometimes, objective and to the best of my ability I try to be as self-disclosed whenever possible, so they may know me. I believe that this makes for good communicating/communication in the long term.

However I find that verbal skills, emotional expressiveness(when appropriate) conversational focus, nonverbal analysis, as well as conversational encouragement and appreciation along with commitment will render the client the best service and facilitate my business more than a marginal edge toward success. In class, we have discussed such attributes as attitudes, beliefs, cultural information, nonverbal communication, and evaluating and improving relationships just to name a few. At this point, I would add mirror-image perceptions.

One of its most important elements to recognize in any type of relationship is not to fall victim to celebrating self-sacrifice and suppression of criticism (Myers, 2008). Robert Holland and colleagues (2005) premise is that our thinking and acting are primed by events of which we are unaware of; they viewed depressed moods which explains negative associations when in a good mood, the past is viewed in a more brighter, positive recollection(p. 76). For me mood in a particular physiological and or psychological state, depending on which mood I am in, my perception has been known to be affected one way or another.

I try to remember once I rethink a situation that my first impression is usually correct, but have been known to err. On those occasions I am reminded that pre-judgment is logical but not always correctable if done verbally. Sometimes the unspoken word is hard to make amends for, but the spoken word, cannot be retracted. That is why when you speak to others you must be mindful of construal processes which allows others to form a perception of you and spontaneously associate a particular trait with you, as Linda Mae, & D. Carlston and Skowronaki, (2000) reported.

We do view our socialization (social worlds) through our beliefs, attitudes, and values. These shape our interpretation of everything else. There is some discussion regarding gender differences in identity formation, so interested Erikson, who views was supported by many researchers that for women identity and intimacy develop together( Moore & Parker, (2007) Critical Thinking; Gilligan viewed female self-esteem to depend on the connections of others (Thorne & Michaelieu, 1996). I have experienced both roles in my past and I am sure they will be revisited in the future.

Me being the only daughter and having one brother, I have seen many days when loyalty and commitment was brought to bear and an objective or subjective decision was needed as soon as possible. When one reflects on their socialization and cultural values, practices, expectations and parental guidance, along with strong ethnic heritage, which includes their belief system, it is hard for that someone to be a subjectivist. It takes me to being mindful of people who make claims they have no history or concept of what makes their comment correct or why it is wrong.

The best way to avoid conflict in a verbal conflict is to be prepared to back up with what you state with evidence, especially if your statement/claim is not self-evident or obviously true or false. One thing for-sure, without evidence you will engage in an argument and it will surely be against or for what was stated. We sometimes take the high road to avoid arguments or taking sides, we use to say when I was a child. One of those methods was to be a subjectivist. Today’s youth have a worse attitude; they say “whatever “to whatever.

This is a sad state of being; our youth for the most part have lost the will to communicate intelligently. Some at this point some may think that I am hyperbolic. I have found that it becomes easier to hyperbole when it comes to reminiscing about the past and trying to explain the present. If we see hyperbole as an obvious slanting device, but also having a more subtle unconscious effect, which can be used to persuade, people are caught off guard and the device works at times. That is not to say that it is a good thing, just to be aware that the use of words can be deceiving.

In business, we use persuasive rhetoric in photography and other images, which helps to improve sales and clientele. They can produce powerful emotional impacts. Visual images can function in the same way as rhetoric of the linguistic variety (Moore & Parker, 2007). Koppes, (1996-2001) cited in the Stop Historian that Industrial organizational psychology is the scientific study of the workplace. Rigor and methods of psychology are applied to issues of critical relevance to business, including talent, management, coaching assessment, selection, training, organizational development, performance, and work-life balance.

We know that from the Hawthorne Effect experiments, we learned that people do perform differently when they are being observed. They also produce more when an incentive is being offered. We also know that commitment, loyalty, efficiency, and effectiveness depend on what that individual feels about themselves and those who they are servicing. Attitude and your perception of what should be done instead of in comparison to what someone else does may be your key to a promotion. We all learn at different speeds and therefore not everyone can be expected to comprehend a new skill at the same rate as everyone else.

We learn that patience and the willingness to train others and become role models for them, enabling them to develop the skills needed to complete. Role modeling is a method that works very well for some; Operant conditioning works very well for others and still some classical conditioning works just fine for them. Whether it is a reward and punishment method or an emulating method, it works for some and not always all methods for everyone. Raymond Cattell and John Horn’s distinction between crystallized intelligence and fluid intelligence (Cattell , 1963; Horn, 1982; Horn & Donaldson, 1980).

For them, crystallized intelligence depends heavily on education and experience (knowledge and judgment acquired through education and experiences) (Bee, 2006). Fluid intelligence the aspect of intelligence that reflects fundamental biological processes and does not depend on specific experiences is help by a bit of logical and critical thinking. The specific behavior people imitate depends on what they perceive as valued in their culture. Bandura’s (1989) version of social learning (newest version) is called social cognitive theory.

The evolution from one name to the next reflects Bandura’s increasing emphasis on cognitive processes as central to development. Cognitive processes are at work as people observe models, learn chunks of behavior, and mentally put the chunks together into complex new behavior patterns (Feldman, 2008). Behavior Genetics believes that our environment influences our behavior to a certain degree. They recognize that the effects of genetic influences, especially on behavioral traits, are rarely inevitable. (Rutter, 2002). Inclusion: I’d like to self- reflect on some of my developments over my short life span.

It has been exciting at times and hard to bear at other times. That I have learned is what we call growing, maturing and allowing our life experiences to develop our future. Now is the time to look at how I impact other individuals and organizations, how I evaluate them and they me. It makes sense for me to look for leadership in something I see in myself. This sounds good, but take for instants, self-confidence, how much does my self-confidence impact my work and those around me? Does it affect my performance and the various organizations in which I participate in?

I think it is very important that I understand myself before I try to understand others or want others to understand me. I want to be as effective as possible in whatever I attempt to accomplish and especially efficient. It takes more than one to believe in himself. One element that we all should strive for is to be goal oriented, having a positive and realistic perception of ourselves and attitude. These variables are characterized by personal attributes such as assertiveness, optimism, enthusiasm, affection, pride, independence, trust, the ability to handle criticism and emotional maturity (Sihera, 2010,para. 1)

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